Empty tank

There are times we do things without thought or reason, simply because it is our normal routine and have become accustomed to being the one everyone depends on, but what happens when that fuel runs dry or completely dries out? What happens to all of those who depended on you without a second thought on how they would have to fend for his or herself.

Many individuals have lost their individuality as a result of being the provider, the nurturer, the rock and forget who he or she as a result. The role has unraveled to a level one cannot grasp because more is expected of someone who does not have much more to give.

How does that person regain who he or she was or how do they reinvent themselves? Can those who depended on this individual fend for themselves? If not, who is to blame? Is there a blame?

Some food for thought…



There’s No One There…

Yes dear. Yes, ma’am. Yes sir. Yes mom. Yes dad.

One-sided conversations. We’ve all had them.

We have stopped listening to one another. There are no longer true conversational pieces, just discussions. Current events are no longer a topic of interest nor the events of what occurred during the day are of interest to the other party. But when do you start to notice the deterioration behind these one-sided conversations. When it is too late to begin to appreciate the other person behind the voice? When it has gone so far that one does not know how you got there? Or when the individual is no longer in your presence?

Is the lack of interest due to boredom? Being too comfortable? Someone else? Or just not interested?

These questions can relate to all things in life. Relationships, work, or a visit to your favorite mall.

These and many other questions may arise when questioning, are you still there? I see you, but are YOU still there? Where have you wandered off to?

The lack of interest may be many things. Self sufficiency is a great one. Feeling relevant to the situation will bring an interest to the “table” immediately, but if there isn’t any self-interest, will one invest precious time to it?

If a salesperson is trying to sell a car, and this individual is solely based off commission, he or she will invest in selling that car wholeheartedly, however, if that same individual is being paid a salary, you may not have the same enthusiasm because he or she does not have an interest, he or she has already been rewarded. Although, the reward is taken place in form of a salary. The same goes for friendships and relationships.

So here’s a note to self – When someone is talking to you, give them the attention you would like to be given to you. If not, tell them politely, now it is not a good time and excuse yourself. It is much better to have manners and not be rude. You’ll be greatly rewarded in many ways.

Yours truly,






You ever sit and wonder, what will tomorrow bring, literally? Not just a metaphor of what can happen, but actually bring something…

Tomorrow – Is not promised. Its a gift.

As individuals, we allow the best of us to get wrapped up in a tidal wave of frustration, anger, and stress at what the day may bring to us.

But how about the other side of it.

Have you ever thought, wow, I was given another day to enjoy this sunshine, the breeze, and see the world. Have another chance to speak to my loved ones, interact with those with annoyed us, and perhaps, made us upset. We were given another chance to leave it all behind and start anew.

We take for granted the ability to open our eyes everyday and see the world. Some individuals didn’t make it to see daylight and others may have lost their sight, but you were given a gift. You were given the gift of life for one more day. That is what tomorrow brought you, a new day.

Cherish your gift.




I’ve taken a hiatus from writing not because I chose to, but because I had way too many inhibitors making it difficult to write. It was either writers’ block, too many ideas and not enough willpower to sort them and write about them and just plain old stress. Stress from what daily life brings to unusual circumstances that just brings us down.

So no, I am not writing today about my circumstances, however, I am writing about how certain situations can overtake our lives without us even knowing it. We slowly become adjusted to the situations, but do not separate ourselves from it to enjoy the the little things that make us happy. For me, one of those things is writing. Writing allows me to express my feelings and thoughts without being judged by someone else. I can express my ideas and thoughts without a sneer or an interruption (if I am lucky). So why did I allow such a long hiatus?

I allowed the outside to meddle the thoughts in my head. I allowed outside influences to distract me from my paper and pen. This can occur in many situations and we don’t realize it until it is too late. At times, we may have time to salvage it and other times, it simply is too late. However, in my case I was able to salvage it and start to put my thoughts together so that I can share with the world. Now, its probably not world,  but you get the idea.

For me, the hiatus was a torment. I wanted to write so badly, but I couldn’t find the words to jot down. Every letter and syllabus was all one to me and nothing made any sense. You can say, I was a bit frazzled and overwhelmed with other things. One thing, I would like to share is, if you come across a time when you just can’t get words onto a paper, take some time to understand what is causing that block. Don’t allow yourself to get flustered, it will come back. When you love to do something, you will always find a way.



Back to Reality

Just a few days ago, I was sitting on the sand surrounded by crystal clear blue waters and the most velvety white sand. The sounds of the ocean was so peaceful. As you sit and look around, you think to yourself, the locals here have it made. They are so lucky. However, the locals are all there trying to survive as you, the tourist, are providing jobs for them. Most of the locals don’t get a chance to go and sit by the beach because they are trying to survive, yet we feel they are lucky.

Now the reverse happens. As I return to my reality and the folks from the island I just visited, are saying the same as I did when I was in their paradise. Wow, these folks here are lucky. As for myself, I am content because I just came back from a wonderful vacation, however, I am saddened because I have to return to my daily grind. The locals I just visited with state, we are lucky because we get to work in air conditioned offices, have a stable and ample income and are able to take multiple vacations. They have so many areas they can visit without having to travel by airplane, they may not have to work as hard as we need to just to make ends meet. Now this may not be true for all, but for some of the locals, I did get a chance to talk to, they were willing to do what they can to earn a living and it is their reality. Whether it may be to rent out jet skis, rent umbrellas/ loungers, or sell food from a makeshift restaurant, which many times are very good, they are struggling to survive.

So here we have it… the tale of two of the lesser evils.

You have one individual who wishes they could live by the tranquil, crystal blue waters and the other who perhaps would like to have a stable environment. Either way, we figure out how to balance one another without inhibiting the other. We may not always feel satisfied with what we have and tend to always look on the other side because we may think the grass may be greener, however, is it?


Yours truly,


Same Day – Different Lifestyle

Its 6am (Wed.)

You wake up
Shower/ dress
Grab a coffee to go
Commute to work
Work 8-10hrs – Squeeze in lunch
Commute home
Prepare/ eat dinner
Go to bed

If you do this everyday with some minor adjustments, your life becomes a daily ritual that turns into a chore. I am not saying there is anything wrong with this lifestyle, many folks like the discipline and routine, but when do you take out the monotony out of it, you have this sense of excitement, something to look forward to.

Its 6am (Wed.)

You wake up
Shower/ dress
Commute, but this time to the community garden
Enjoy a cup of tea
Read the paper/ book
Volunteer planting flowers
Enjoy lunch by the gardens
Water/ walk the gardens
Commute home
Prepare/ eat dinner
Read a book
Go to bed

How did that day sound? Now I am realistic and I know it can’t be like that everyday, but wouldn’t it be so much better to live to work than work to live. We need to find a balance in ourselves and enjoy life. Work to live is a lifestyle many folks have adapted these days, but its time for a change. Its time to live to work and enjoy life. Enjoy your surroundings and all it has to offer. Enjoy the birds chirping. Feel the warmth of the sun. Gaze at the moonlight. Don’t let life pass us by without appreciating all it has to offer.

My newfound motto is: Live to Work, not Work to Live




Dimly Lit Spark

There’s a thousand words that are waiting to be put into thoughts, so many emotions to write on paper, but not enough spark to drive that fire, the pilot is dimly lit.

Some would call it lack of motivation, burnout, but it is none of the above, it is disappointment. Disappointment of the over achiever not achieving. That elephant is constantly staring from the corner, but you have no words to say. Not because you don’t want to, is because you just can’t. Those words that are waiting to pour out somehow can’t leave your body, you wish there was a way to express how you feel, but it stays bottled up because it’s much easier.

Is this feeling self-inflicted? How do you cope and deal with the feeling of hopelessness?

Finding inner strength to combat disappointment can be a losing battle. The war imposed on yourself can only be won by one person, you; can you honestly pick a winning side? Which battle are you fighting? The lack of achievement, the emotional battle or all of the above. Are there other players? Who else contributes to this war within yourself? You have so many questions, with little or no answers.

Disappointment gives the individual a lackluster of emotions and unable to express unbiased feelings. Ultimately, the only one in charge is you. You are your destiny. You define who you want to be. You can choose to accept the disappointment or you can tear it down. Allow those words to flow and use it as your shield.



Just thoughts of the day

So what happens when you have so many thoughts but just can’t jot them down on paper.. thoughts that hijacked your every idea and whim, thoughts of you wanting more, but not enough to steam to turn those thoughts into action.

You did everything you could;

You engaged so that you can excel;

You chose not to fail;

You can’t seem to succeed…

So what happens when these are your everyday thoughts? How do you overcome your own mental exasperation of failure?



Life passing us by

Its 6:00 am. I slept 5 hours and feel a bit tired, but I reach over and grab the phone before I start my day. Let’s see what I’ve missed while I was asleep.

Today, many folks wake up to this very same scenario every day. Before even having a cup of Joe, we reach over to check the latest updates, check the news, or even read emails.

But, the first thing we do is grab that little device that has a hold on us. Take a minute and look around. There will always be someone either looking at their phone or having it within inches of their reach.

But the phenomena doesn’t stop there. It just isn’t your millennials reaching for their treasured device, you have many generations such as the silent generation, generation X and your baby boomers that are also attached to their treasures. The fear of being disconnected in today’s modern age is fierce and today’s technology has everyone engaged.

What is the infatuation with always being connected? Do we feel we can’t let go for a single minute without knowing everything that is happening out of our presence?

What are your thoughts?



Fashion Trends Mishaps

Each decade has their own fashion trends and many folks adapt to some of these trends without any censorship. However, when is too much just tooooo much??

One of the newest fashion trends being used are flowy or denim shorts. But these aren’t your ordinary shorts, these shorts have been designed to see more than your thighs. There also older fashion trends such a wearing jeans while exposing your underwear which has also been widely used.

Flowy shorts:  These shorts have been designed as short shorts with the ability to feel free in them, however, it leaves little to the imagination as the individual wearing these shorts, exposed more than just your thighs. Because of the design of these shorts, it allows for the assets of the individual to be seen.

Newest fad in denim shorts:  So these shorts I am sure have a name, however, they can be compared to boy shorts or other type of female underwear. These “shorts” does not in any way, shape or form leave anything to the imagination and will make people feel uncomfortable around you as too many body parts are exposed. You can compare these shorts to wearing beach wear at the supermarket.

Baggy jeans:  The majority of this trend seems to be worn by the male gender exposing their underwear or shorts. These are not your average baggy jeans. After doing some research, they are called Hip Hop Baggy Jeans. Seems to be a tad stereotypical, however, that is what they are referred to. Some of these jeans have been known to be worn sometimes to the knees, exposing way too much.

So, why are individuals wearing these fashion trends baring their assets. Has this become the norm of today’s society? Have we allowed these fashionistas to go too far in their fashion trends? What message are we sending to vulnerable young men and women who are exposed to such fashion?

This fashion statement sends many mixed messages to young children. Based on many conversations led with others, we teach them to express themselves respectfully, but why would parents allow their underage children wear such an atrocity?

In evolution, many changes occur, but when will we (Society) put a halt of some of these damaging fashion trends. When we go buy groceries, do we want to be exposed to someone’s back side? Do we want to expose our elementary school age children to this?

When fashion has just gone too far..